Happiness. The best gift you can give.

Imagine a gift that lasts and lasts. that doesn't sit on a shelf. or get eaten. OR get taken back to the shop.

 One that brings happiness not for a fleeting moment. But for weeks or months.

Imagine treating a loved-one to that for just £15 - and at the same time gifting it to a person somewhere who can't afford it.

That's what's behind the Do Happiness Programme. The latest joyful offering from Do Something Different and Action for Happiness. 

 from the latest blog at www.dsd.me :

Created with our friends at Action for Happiness, Do Happiness is a six-week programme of personally tailored small actions (Do’s) designed to help you to develop more happiness for yourself and for the people around you.

How does it work?

It’s simple. You carry out our quick online happiness questionnaire. We then send you daily Do’s: psychologically powerful actions designed by our expert psychologists and picked especially for you to help bring more happiness into your life.

How will it help you to be happier?

The programme has been created around Action for Happiness’ 10 keys to happier living. Based on the latest research, the 10 keys are things that have been see to consistently make people’s lives happier and more fulfilling. Together they spell “GREAT DREAM”:

• Giving
• Relating
• Exercising
• Appreciating
• Trying out

• Direction
• Resilience
• Emotion
• Acceptance
• Meaning

Your Do Happiness programme will give you Do’s that will help you to explore any of the keys that might be lacking in your life, together with some inspirational quotes. All in all you get 32 Do’s over six weeks, with each one inviting you to do things that are known to increase happiness in our lives, and the in the lives of people around us. Some of them will be quite small, like appreciating things around you for example. Others, like carrying out a random act of kindness or contacting someone from the past you have lost contact with, might take a little courage.

Taken together, your Do’s will help you to practise happy habits almost every day for six weeks. Practise making scones or playing badminton for six weeks and you’ll find you’re much better at it by the end. The same applies to happiness!

Share the happiness

Everyone on the Do Happiness programme can share comments in our Do Zone and help one another along. Individuals might choose to sign up with a friend or family member and do it together. It’s also great for small companies or departments within companies who want to boost morale or just have some fun together.

We give one away free for everyone who joins

Because we don’t think money should get in the way of happiness, every place that's bought generates a place for someone that can’t afford it. 

People who can’t afford it can register on the waiting list to get a place as soon as it comes available. 

What’s more, people who buy a place instantly help someone who needs it, which means they’re spreading happiness as soon as they sign up.

How much does it cost?

Do Happiness costs £15 for a six-week programme – a total of 32 daily Do’s sent by email (and/or text to your mobile phone if you’re inside the EU). That’s less than the cost of a massage for something that lasts a lot, lot longer.

Boost your happiness today

Bring some extra happiness into your life, your family and friends’ lives or your business, and look forward to more happiness, one Do at a time.

Find out more or join now

Visit Action for Happiness

Losing trust... or... would you frisk your friends?

Looking back over the past year of economic doldrums, how has it most affected you?

Are you saving more for a rainy day?

We all should be. But we’re also a bit more worried about who to trust with our savings (more so if we live in Cyprus).

Are you cutting back on spending?

Again, a sheconomical strategy. But there comes a point where you can’t cut back any more. The point where you feel so miserable you have to buy something to cheer yourself up.

Are you less trusting?

Let’s do a quick trust check. Who do you think is most trustworthy?
a) a banker enjoying a massive bonus while taxpayers bail out the bank

b) a journalist with an unhealthy interest in others’ mobile phone activity

c) a politician with a bad memory for policy pledges

d) a sleazy disc jockey

e) none of the above

It’s no wonder, given recent events, that we are all eyeing high profile figures with more suspicion. In fact a third of us say we are less trusting than we were a year ago, according to a Trust Study published by the Yorkshire Building Society* today.

You do trust me don't you Vera ... I mean Joan..?

Trust matters. Why? Because we need to know those around us have our interests at heart. That they won’t harm us, lie to us or let us down. To believe that those in positions of power won’t abuse that power. When trust is broken we feel shaken, vulnerable and panicked into looking after Number One. In fact, trust is so important that humans are hard-wired to decide in a micro-second whether or not someone is trustworthy.

Imagine living in a world where nobody trusted anyone.

Just buying a coffee would be a nightmare. The barrista offers the cup but won’t let go until he’s got your money in his hand. You won't part with the cash until you’ve got your coffee in case he whips it away. It'd be like being caught up in one of those perpetual childhood games where neither side will give in.

Imagine not trusting friends who visit your house and frisking them as they leave.

Or having to pay for everything you order from the restaurant menu before you get it.

Or finding out the bracelet your husband gave you on your anniversary is actually an electronic tagging device.

It’s good to trust others. It's nice to assume positive intent in everyone we meet. Because I truly believe that most people are kind and caring and trustworthy. 

Unfortunately though, we tend to hear a lot more about the minority who aren’t.

More on the Yorkshire Building Society Trust report here

Banks or building societies?

It’s worth noting that Yorkshire Building Society is a mutual, which means they’re owned by and run for their members. Because they have no shareholders to answer to, any profits they make are used to maintain the financial security of the business and then returned to members in the form of better rates and service. That's nice to know.

Are your savings gathering more dust than interest?

Funny things, human beings. And never funnier (I mean in the strange sense, not ha ha) than in our dealings with money. If you doubt that, then test which side of your brain is managing your money

We search for the cheapest jar of coffee in the supermarket, tutting at the 30p price difference per jar, then hand over £2.45 for a single cup in Starbucks.

We leave our savings to fester away gathering more dust than interest, while at the same time carrying credit card debt.

Do you know what you;re saving for?
This very specific pot is by terramundi

Behavioural economists call this illogical behaviour mental accounting – or treating money differently depending on its source or label, something I've discussed in earlier blogs about using the left brain a bit more. 

An example is our attitude to money we’ve saved and money that’s dropped into our laps (I know, but bear with me on this one)... 

Would you blow your savings on a big birthday party extravaganza? Probably not, unless that was what you’d be saving for. It would seem too… reckless? Irresponsible? 

But what if you got an unexpected tax rebate and had a big birthday coming up? Woohoo, champagne cocktails all round!

I got to thinking about all this while working on a campaign for first direct, the online bank, to do with offset mortgages. 

Apparently nearly all mortgages in Australia are offset. They originated there and it's what most people go for.

Yet a mere 6% of UK mortgages are offset mortgages. This is probably because this concept feels a bit alien to us. After all, when mental accounting, we Brits have kept our borrowing and our savings very separate. It doesn’t even occur to us that we could use one to offset the other. Mentally they are two disconnected amounts of money.

  

Of course another reason we shun offset mortgages is because we don’t even know what they are.  

Offset mortgages simply allow any savings or current account balances to be offset against the mortgage, with interest only being payable on the difference between the two.

o   e.g. if a borrower has a £100,000 mortgage and £10,000 in savings, they will only pay interest on the difference (i.e. 90,000).

Dead easy really. You use your savings to work for you, but still hang on to them. 

This makes real logical sense for anyone who has both savings and a mortgage, and now more than ever before. Savings interest rates are so abysmally low at the moment, the loss of interest on them would be more than outweighed by the reduction in mortgage interest.

For more info check out the first direct website http://www.firstdirect.com

What ‘price’ do you put on being fashionable?

Fashion theorists often debate whether fashion liberates or enslaves women. Arguably, all fashions are enslaving. 

But some are more enslaving than others. 

Tight skirts restrict free movement.

Heels are one of the weird ways in which women
 are trapped by fashion,
according to Professor Mary Beard.

High heels make walking difficult and running nigh impossible.

And then there are nail extensions.

Nail extensions strike me as the most enslaving of all current fashions. Just when we’ve become liberated to the point where we can do virtually anything men can do, we go and turn ourselves into Edwina Scissorhands.

Modern handicapping?

In fact, the practice of affixing acrylic appendages to the ends of women’s fingers strikes me as the modern equivalent of foot-binding.

It undermine’s women autonomy. It stops them from performing a whole host of quotidien acts fundamental to life.I have normal, unextended nails. That means I am free to:

• Knead dough
• Tickle a baby
• Throw a pot on a wheel
• Sow seeds
• Caress my husband

without causing anybody grievous bodily harm.
I defy anyone to do any of those things in one-and-a-half-inch rock-hard chiselled and lacquered nail extensions (OK I just defy anyone to do the last one).
As Thoreau said, “The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it”
At the risk of getting my eyes scratched out, I would say any fashion that involves physical bonds is over-priced. Not just monetarily but in the treasured moments of life sacrificed for it.

I'm all for adornment, just not into self-crippling or self-handicapping adornment.  

Check this out:

The Body Adorned exhibition at the Horniman Museum explores how people clothe and adorn their bodies, with a special focus on London. Over time, saris, tattoo parlours, nail bars, distended ears and scarification have become a visible, everyday part of the London cityscape. But how did cultural adornments become integrated into urban London life? This exhibition invites you to look at how you dress your body and why. It’s well worth a visit.

The Body Adorned runs until

 6^th January 2013. 

www.horniman.ac.uk

Everything must change

This is a blog I wrote this month for Jayne Cox, the body image consultant who is currently running a wonderful campaign to help women cope with cancer. I thought I'd repost it here because the central message - about adapting to changes in circumstance - applies to the many twists and turns that life takes.....

There’s a song by Nina Simone that starts:

"Everything must change.... nothing stays the same"

It’s a beautiful haunting song.

One line goes, "There are not many things in life you can be sure of..."

A poignant reminder that everything changes. 

Our ideas shift. Our moods swing. People come and go. The weather changes. So does fashion.

Our bodies get sick. Friendships are gained and lost. 

We live in a world where nothing stays the same. And sometimes it’s hard to hang on to anything that will offer us security and protection. But there’s one lesson we can learn from nature. If you adapt, life is so much better. And that means letting go of old ideas and ways of being, and becoming more flexible.

Flexibility is key to coping with change, to having a good life and meaningful relationships. A flexible person is one everyone wants to be with. They don’t make unreasonable demands on others. They’ll go with the flow and still smile through it. They let go of the past easily and embrace change.

Faced with one of life’s crises, such as cancer, flexibility helps a woman cope with the fears and frustrations. She can adapt to the present reality, even though it may not be the reality she had planned.

Because reality knows nothing of your plans. It will come up with ever new ways to frustrate and frighten you. If you can’t adapt to the new reality you may be stressed, irritable, hostile - perhaps overwhelmed, grumbling, resisting.

That leaves little mental and emotional energy for dealing with what matters. Relaxing rigidity and expectations will help you to yield to others without getting too depresssed or upset. It also gives new space to those around you to express what they are thinking and feeling.

In our behaviour change work we give people who are coping with change a new mantra. Do Something Different. 

Because, in a changing world, if you’re still trying to hang on to old ways of being you might come crashing down.

Instead you can adapt and flourish.

Nothing has to stay the same. If you always loved classical music, try blasting out some rock. If your wardrobe was sensible and conservative, wear something wacky. If you were a shrinking violet, get gobby and voice your opinions. Wear odd socks. Give more hugs. Dance under the stars. Give some money away. Sing loudly.

If anyone says, “But you don’t…” be ready to say, “Well I do now”

Times of change are also times for reinvention. Don’t be afraid to use this time to become the person you always wanted to be.

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